Monday, 28 February 2011

The Beast of Bogrims Marsh.

   When Archie Fox awoke the morning after a night of drinking with his pals he wondered why his head ached so much as he had not drunk anymore than normal. His scalp felt as though it had shrunk around his skull and the latter was trying to break out. He managed to drag himself  up and sit on the edge  of his bed where he stared into space.
 Billy, his large mix breed dog. stood up from his bed in the corner of the bedroom, stretched his long limbs, arched his back, flexed his well sprung chest, shook his massive flanks, wagged his long ratlike tail, strolled over to his master and placed his massive paw on Archie's knee, he gazed into Archie's eyes with a look of adoration in his own blue left eye and brown right eye; he had more breeds in him then Battersby Dogs Home. Archie twiddled the dogs pendant ear- the other one stood erect like a German Shepherd dogs- as he stared through glazed eyes at the photo of his late wife. 'I wish you were still here,' he mumbled to the photo; something he often did since Milly his wife died, Archie was no different to most grieving people, he believed that she could hear him; at least he wished she could.
 He hauled himself up from the bed, followed by Billy; who he let out for his morning pee before staggering into his bathroom to relieve himself.
 He shuffled into his living room and flopped down on the sofa, supporting his head in his hands. He felt too ill to bother that Billy was making an almighty racket in the back garden, Archie had built a strong fence between his own bungalow and his spinster sister neighbours. Billy had made a nuisance of himself by chasing their Pink poodle and Chihuahua dogs around for the fun of it. The Poodle had ventured too closely to a dip in the ground beneath the fence and waggled its pompom temptingly in front of Billy's nose as the poodle snapped and yapped at the fence.
  Lilly and Fanny Thompson's wizened little pointy faces peered over the fence to see what all the hullabaloo was about. 'Archie, are you there? your beastly dog is tearing Priscilla's hat!' Fanny shouted. Archie did not appear. 'His doors open,; maybe he's gone out front?' Lilly said.
  Archie's headache had worsened and his face felt numb. He tried to shout to Billy but he could not control his tongue. He wanted to grasp the arm of the sofa in order to pull himself up, but his hands would not work. Lights flashed and danced before his eyes, he slumped forwards and then sidewards across the sofa, he tried to shout to anyone within hearing range but his words came out as slurring gibberish; though no one was within hearing range.
 The sisters were now peering through his bay window at the front of his bungalow with their bony little hands cupped around their elfin faces. 'Archibald!' they shouted in unison as they spotted the distorting body of their neighbour slipping from the sofa and down onto the floor.
  The sisters dare not enter through the back gate as Billy was now running around and growling as he played with the pompom trophy that he had torn from Priscilla's hat and Lucy the pug had joined her friend at the fence, adding her shrill bark to that of her fellow model; as that is what the dogs were to the sisters who had a thriving cottage industry going. They made clothes for dogs and sold them around the world as well as in the UK.
 The Sisters scurried back to their own home took their little treasures back into the safety of the house, away from the terrible hound next door and called the ambulance and the police. It was a long phone call as they could not make themselves heard above the shrill yaps of the dogs, to say that they were disgruntled at the uncouth hound destroying one of their hats would be an understatement. So the sisters shut them up in the walk in dog wardrobe in the pampered pooches room where their yapping cries were more muffled.

 Constable Petit of the dog section calmed Billy down in the back garden and came back into the house to talk to the sisters whist the para medics attended to Archie.
'He will have to go to the re-homing kennels,' said Constable Petit.
'Oh no he won't, what if Archibald recovers, and comes home to an empty house; Billy is the only company that he has,' Lilly said, 'We'll look after him until he is back home.' Her words startled Fanny, 'We can't have the brute in our house the girlie's won't like it.'
'We don't have to take him in our house we can feed him here...'
'And what about walking him? You know as well as I do that Archie takes him for miles and lets him catch those dear little bunnies; you take a look in his freezer officer, they are serial animal murderers.'
'I think the man has enough problems madam without me arresting him...'
Lilly interrupted him, 'Oh, Fanny Mummy and Daddy named you correctly; you do fanny around. I have a plan. Would you excuse us officer I need to speak to my sister in private.'
'Don't you be so crude Lillian, if Mummy could hear you she would lock you in your room for a week.'
'Oh shut up mummies no longer here!' Lily said, as she ushered her sister out into the front garden.
 Billy paraded up and down in the back, knocking  Archie's widow boxes down as he scratched at them in an attempt to get to his friend through the window.

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